Young People Haven’t Given Up on Family—They’re Waiting for the Right Conditions
From Seoul to Stockholm, Rome to Rio, falling birth rates have become one of the defining public policy concerns of the 21st century. Governments worry about ageing populations, shrinking workforces and the sustainability of welfare systems. Public debate often frames younger generations as less interested in marriage and parenthood than those who came before them.
A new report by the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) suggests the conversation has been asking the wrong question.
Drawing on survey responses from 108,926 internet-connected young adults aged 18–39 across 73 countries and territories, Lives, Choices and Futures: What Young People Want and What Shapes Their Decisions about Relationships and Parenthood explores not only what young people aspire to, but also what stands in their way. The findings reveal a remarkably consistent pattern across diverse societies: most young adults still value partnership and parenthood, yet many believe the economic and social conditions necessary to achieve these goals are increasingly out of reach.
The authors of this publication are Priscilla Idele, Elizabeth Wilkins and Alessio Cangiano of UNFPA and a group of researchers from Bocconi University coordinated by Arnstein Aassve (Department of Social and Political Sciences, Dondena Centre for Research on Social Dynamics and Public Policy, Bocconi University), including Elisa Latora and Luca Di Casola as co-authors and Letizia Mencarini, Chen Peng and Samuel Plach as participants to the survey and research design.
Family remains an ambition—not a relic
Young people’s aspirations do not seem to match the stereotypes often portrayed in public debate.
Nearly 90% of respondents identify economic security and good health as their top life priorities, while 73% say that family life, including having a partner and children, is important. Marriage also remains the preferred long-term relationship for most respondents, with more than two-thirds choosing marriage, either immediately or after a period of cohabitation, as their ideal living arrangement.
The report summarizes this shift in perspective with a sentence that will possibly shape future demographic debates:
“The question is not whether young people value these life goals, but whether they have the conditions to realize them.” (p. 7)
This distinction is more than semantic. It redirects attention from individual preferences to structural conditions. Young adults are not abandoning family life; many are postponing it because they perceive it as financially risky or practically unattainable.
The evidence is particularly striking among respondents aged 25–39. Among those who would ideally like to marry or live with a partner, one quarter are currently single and not dating. This is not necessarily a rejection of relationships but an illustration of the widening gap between aspirations and lived experience.
Economic insecurity is only part of the story
Money matters—but the report argues that reducing today's demographic challenges to economics alone would be too simplistic. Financial security, stable employment and affordable housing undoubtedly shape young people's decisions: 81% of respondents say financial security is an essential prerequisite for entering a partnership, while 72% identify economic and housing constraints as the main barrier to having children. Yet these obstacles are embedded in a broader framework of personal agency and life opportunities.
Rather than treating falling birth rates as a problem to be corrected, the authors advocate a rights-based perspective that places individual choice at the center of demographic policy.
“Our role is not to make those choices for young people, but to help ensure they have the agency, freedom, opportunities and support to make them for themselves.” (p. 7)
This marks an important shift in the debate. The objective is not to persuade people to marry earlier or have more children, but to remove the barriers that prevent them from making the choices they already aspire to. In practical terms, that means investing in affordable housing, stable employment, accessible childcare, gender-equitable parental leave and workplaces that make it possible to reconcile careers with family life. According to the survey, these are not simply social policies—they are the conditions that allow young adults to turn aspirations into reality.
Hope survives despite uncertainty
The report also highlights the coexistence of optimism and anxiety.
Around two-thirds of respondents say they feel somewhat or very positive about the future, even while expressing widespread concern about conflict, economic insecurity and inequality. Conflict and security risks top the list of worries globally, followed closely by economic uncertainty, whereas artificial intelligence—despite attracting enormous political and media attention—ranks lowest among the concerns explored in the survey.
The geographical patterns are equally revealing. Respondents in many lower-income countries report significantly greater optimism than their peers in wealthier societies, despite often facing more challenging objective conditions. At the same time, perceptions of inequality remain remarkably widespread across virtually all regions, suggesting that confidence in one’s future and awareness of social disparities can comfortably coexist. The report frames this broader perspective in a sentence that extends well beyond demography:
“Understanding and responding to demographic change requires attention not only to demographic outcomes themselves, but also to the social, economic and institutional conditions that enable individuals to realize the futures they desire.” (p. 8)
Rather than seeing declining fertility as a problem to be solved through persuasion, the authors argue for a rights-based approach that prioritizes people’s ability to make genuinely free choices about relationships and parenthood.
